Welcome to my little internet place! I just moved in, so I’m still decorating and unpacking and getting to know the area, but I’m pretty happy to be here.
Some of you might know me from the old neighborhood – I visit now and again, and I’ll always love it there, but I’ve mostly, and happily, relocated. It was time for a change of pace, a throwback to who I was once upon a time, and a comfy space to settle in to the new person I’m becoming every day.
Sooo… ummm… what do I plan to accomplish here? Maybe you’re wondering that, too…? Don’t worry, we can muddle through that together. I really don’t know much except for the fact that at the old space, posts were essentially updates on my daily life and the status of my reproductive system. That won’t be the case here.
Well, unless my reproductive system does something truly atrocious to me, and then I’ll shame it all over the interwebs, because aside from kitten videos and pornography, why else did Al Gore invent this thing, anyway?
So really, I’d like to tell you some stories. Some of them will be true tales of daring and adventure and alcohol-fueled idiocy, and some of them will be random musings – probably things I think of in the shower, because that’s where all the best thoughts happen, clearly.
I can’t guarantee you much, except for a few things:
- I will use colorful profanity.
- I will make you laugh – with me… at me… doesn’t matter.
- I will actively search for opportunities to exploit my stellar sexual innuendo skills.
- I will make you wonder if I was dropped on my head at some point during childhood.
- I will be awkward and nerdy and make you wonder how I ever landed me a male suitor.
- I will be exceptionally long-winded; like, you will wonder if I was the writer behind that extra hour of unnecessary footage at the end of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. It’s bad, you guys. I could go on forever, especially when I’m passionate about something. Or bored. Or tired. Or hungry…
- I will share pictures that make you laugh. Or that make me laugh. Or pictures of me when I was a child that make EVERYONE laugh.
So that’s what you’re signing up for by visiting here today. I hope you come back sometime soon, and I’ll work on more content in the meantime.
And… uhhh… next time, bring pizza, okay? And wine. Definitely wine.